Die Wesley, Hi Oz
by Angelet
Summary: For the Buffy/Angel fan who hates Wesley. Ever wanted to kill him? I have, and I did. If you like Wesley DON'T READ THIS.


Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters or anything having to do with the TV show Angel. This is purely for fun.  
  
I wrote a very short story about killing Wesley a bit ago, and people liked it so much I thought I'd start a series. So for all you Wesley haters, here's another cruel death. Rated PG-13 for content. Enjoy, and remember, if you LIKE Wesley, (not only should you put yourself out of your misery as soon as possible, but) DON'T READ THIS.   
  
Die Wesley, Hi Oz  
  
  
It's a normal day at Angel Investigations. Angel is asleep dreaming of poor Darla, Cordelia is fussing over her new hairdo and Wesley is attempting futily to stand around looking manly. To break up the dull mood, the door swings open. In walks Oz. Both Wesley and Cordelia hurry to greet him.  
  
CORDELIA  
Oz! Wow, it's been so long! (She gives him a big hug.) How are you? Where have you been? How's the lycanthropy?  
  
OZ  
Hey. (He sports an Oz smile, acknowledging that it's nice to see her too.)  
  
WESLEY  
Yes it is good to see you, do come sit down. (He gestures to a couch.)  
  
CORDELIA  
Angel should be up soon, so what brings you here?  
  
They all sit at the couch. Cordy looking at Oz expectantly, and Wesley trying to sit nonchalantly on the side of the couch and falling down instead. Cordelia shoots him a look of disgust, and turns her smile back to Oz. Oz sits smiling and looking back and forth between the two.  
  
OZ  
Not much. Looking for a job. Thought Angel might have one.  
  
CORDELIA  
(Looking worriedly at Wesley) Well, actually we just hired someone new and business has been kind of slow. I'm trying to get a raise myself......but it would be great to have you on the team. Having someone intelligent around here would be nice. (Throwing a glance at Wesley.)  
  
WESLEY  
I seem to recall I'm the one who used to be a Watcher. I think that takes intelligence, don't you, Oz?  
  
OZ  
Sometimes.  
  
WESLEY  
Just a moment, speaking of intelligence it just occurred to me. It's a full moon tonight isn't it?  
  
CORDELIA  
You're right! Wow! Oz! You're cured!  
  
OZ  
Well, not exactly. I've been studying Zen and meditation. I have it under control. It's not gone.  
  
WESLEY  
I don't understand. Why aren't you back in Sunnydale with Willow then?  
  
OZ  
(Looking uncomfortable) She has other things in her life.  
  
CORDELIA  
(Understanding) Oh, right, sorry about that, Oz.  
  
WESLEY  
Did I miss something? What else does she have in her life?  
  
CORDELIA  
(Pointedly) Nevermind, Wesley.  
  
WESLEY  
What is she dating someone new? Oh that's right! She's dating Tara now isn't she?  
  
CORDELIA  
(hissing) Wesley!  
  
Oz grows more uncomfortable and begins to squirm in his seat.  
  
WESLEY  
Oh, that's too bad, she dumped you for Tara and now you've lost the love of your life, that must be awful, I can't imagine what it would be like to finally be able to be with my one true love and have it ripped away from me like....  
  
At that point Oz lost control. The pains of the change take over him and he doubles over. Cordelia jumps up and runs to get Angel, screaming his name the whole way. Wesley turns to run, but, true to his klutzy nature, he trips and twists his ankle.  
  
WESLEY  
I'm terribly sorry, I didn't mean to upset you...  
  
Oz completes his change, and looks down at the trembling Wesley.  
  
WESLEY  
(Whispering in fear) Um, Angel...  
  
Oz chooses that moment to attack. Wesley screams in pain, but his girlie swats at the werewolf are useless. He dies, painfully, having his right arm ripped out of it's socket first, then his nose, and then Oz nibbles on his left foot before spitting it out and going for the heart.  
  
CORDELIA  
(Entering the room behind Angel and seeing the dead Wesley.) Oh my God! OZ NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! You'll ruin the carpet!  
  
At the sound of her voice, Oz seems to calm. He backs away from the body, and curls up in the corner of the room where he transforms back into a human. Trembling he stares at the corpse.  
  
OZ  
I never wanted to kill anyone. I just wanted a job.....  
  
ANGEL  
(Looking from the body, to Oz, to Cordelia.) Looks like we have an opening. (Smiles at Oz and offers him a blanket.) Welcome aboard.  
  



End file.
